I've been having a bad year. M put the idea into my head with her 'good year' theory. (That some years are much better than others.) She told me that her 15th and 19th years had been the best so far. I was trying to see if any year/s stood out as particularly good, when it struck me that the last year had been particularly bad.
That was a couple of months ago, and since then things had been getting steadily worse. I waited anxiously for my birthday, hoping that it would signal some change in fortune, but my birthday came and went and the bad stuff stayed. I began hoping it was a calendar year (as opposed to a birth year), but as December approached, I started worrying that it was actually two bad years, back to back.
And today, I read this gem of Rumi's.
I have lived on the lip of insanity
Wanting to know reasons
Knocking on a door, it opens
I have been knocking from the inside!
It said to me that everything I've wanted, I've always had. It occurred to me that two big things I'd been hoping for for sometime, came through this year. And instead of being grateful, I'd cribbed about it. This festival of giving thanks is really about acknowledging every blessing in your life. It's about shifting the focus from what's wrong in your life, to the abundant things that are right. Because quite often, the only thing that's wrong is your perspective.
1 comments:
Well, i suppose i could change my perspective...
But if i don't whine about my life to people, i'd never have anything to talk about!!
What a conundrum. :P
Besides, i have it on good authority that the 23rd year is particularly harsh. So it's probably better to whine now, while i still have the chance. :D
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